My big distraction this week has been customer service issues.

I noticed that something funny was going on either with one of the electrical circuits in my kitchen or the refrigerator. I looked it up, and after doing some testing, it seems like the problem is with the refrigerator. This is something that’s known to happen with older refrigerators, and this one is nearly 16 years old. It’s working, and I’ve got a workaround going, but it probably needs to be replaced. With the likely issue and with the age of it, this repair would not be worth it.

So I went to order a new refrigerator. Home Depot said they couldn’t deliver anything before mid July, but I found what I needed at Best Buy, and they said they could deliver as soon as Monday. So I placed the order and took the Monday morning delivery slot they offered. Then last night, I got an e-mail saying I needed to set a delivery appointment. I followed their link, and they had the appointment I’d chosen as my second choice and said I needed to choose a first choice before that date, but none were available. I tried doing the online help chat thing, but nothing happened other than it sitting there for two hours saying it would connect me to an agent. I called this morning, used the callback feature, and eventually talked to someone. It turned out that the problem was that they didn’t have that unit in inventory and couldn’t even set a delivery date. I don’t know why they didn’t just say that instead of letting me order and set a delivery date, then telling me I needed to set a new date. So I cancelled that order.

I found almost the same thing at the same price at Lowe’s, and they said they could deliver in 3-7 days, but said they’d be in touch to schedule delivery. I’m waiting on that now. We’ll see if they actually have something. The order confirmation e-mail just says they’ll call with a delivery appointment, but says there may be “delays.” It would be nice if they built the delays into the information they give you when you order. If it’s going to be 4-6 weeks, then put that in up front. Don’t promise 3-7 days.

It seems that this is a combo problem between the pandemic and the trade war. There were already issues from the trade war with China, and then they shut down manufacturing. Plus, people sheltering at home are buying home stuff. I just hope my fridge holds out, since it’s pretty full. The freezer is my main concern. The stuff currently in the fridge will probably be eaten over the weekend, but I’ve got about a month worth of food in the freezer. If I get really desperate, I’ll pick up a dorm fridge and cook the meat in the freezer.

But I did not need this distraction. I’m trying to revise a book, and with having to buy a new refrigerator, I definitely need to get some books out there so I can bring in some money.

If you found my discussion of some of the panels from the Nebula conference intriguing, you can still retroactively attend the conference, and the conference will also be continuing online all year. If you register for the conference, you can see all the panels, and now there will also be other networking and learning events going on all year. You don’t have to be a member of the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America to participate, and there are scholarships available. All the information is here.

I’m afraid I’ve become That Person during lockdown, the annoying one who’s using the time for self-improvement rather than sloth. I’m studying a foreign language, attending online workshops, reading a lot, listening to classical music, watching Shakespeare productions online, trying new recipes, practicing the flute, and doing a massive home organization project. Sometimes I annoy even myself.

In addition to the Nebula conference, I’ve been watching some online seminars my university has made available to alumni, and I’ve been looking for educational videos on various topics on YouTube. I’ve really been enjoying the National Theatre productions that have been posted each week, along the the weekly musical. I’d thought I might need to get another streaming service, but so far I’ve hardly been watching the one I have. I might look into Netflix or Disney+ this fall, but during the summer I’ve been going outside in the evenings.

I did have actual social interaction last week when I ran into a friend from church while I was out walking, and we stood a safe distance apart and chatted for a while. I think that’s the first time I’d talked to a friend in person since March.

I’m getting close to the end of revisions on this book. I just need to rewrite the ending. What I’ve written is rather anticlimactic, so I need to write something entirely different. But first I have to figure out what that should be. That’s today’s challenge.

I’ve been struggling with what I should say about recent events in this country. I know that a lot of my readers turn to my books to escape from the real world, so the last thing they want to hear from me is stuff about the real world. I also don’t want to make these issues about me or come across like all those “we’re here for you in these uncertain times” e-mails I’ve been getting from every company I’ve ever given an e-mail address to. I use my online presence to promote my books, and I don’t want to use other people’s pain to promote my books.

At the same time, silence is cowardly. Some issues are big enough that you have to speak out. So, on this occasion, I’m going to let the real world intrude.

I like to think of myself as someone who isn’t racist. I’ve always had a fairly diverse group of friends, which is one of the benefits of growing up on military bases. I liked to think that everyone was pretty much alike inside and we were all equal.

But the fact is that the world treats us differently, and we have to acknowledge that in order to change it. My big wake-up call came when I tried to watch the movie Hidden Figures on HBO. I couldn’t deal with the opening scene, in which the women were confronted by a racist cop. I got so infuriated on their behalf that I was actually shouting at the TV. I wanted to throw things. I wanted to hurt him. I had to turn off the movie because my blood pressure was spiking.

And then it struck me: I didn’t have the strength to watch a movie about that treatment. Just imagine what it must be like to have to live it — all those daily indignities of dealing with people who regard you as lesser. It has to take so much strength to not be exploding with rage all the time.

It would be nice to say that things have changed since then, but clearly they haven’t, and what we’ve seen has to be the tip of the iceberg, given that this is how some police officers are acting when they know they’re being filmed, when there should be heightened awareness because of so many other recent incidents. That suggests they don’t fear the consequences, and that means there’s some rot at the core for them to feel safe acting that way in public view. I have friends who are cops or former cops, and I know that there are a lot of good ones, but the fact that there are those who fearlessly act this way in public suggests that there’s not a lot of peer pressure to the contrary. Things have to change, at the very least to the point where police are afraid to be brutal to the people they’re supposed to protect because they know there will be consequences. I don’t care what crime has been committed, the police are not judge, jury, and executioners.

It’s alarming how similar today’s world is to the Gilded Age era I researched for Rebel Mechanics. We still have so much systemic inequality. I wish I could make everything better. In the meantime, I’m trying to listen and learn so that in my own interactions I can do better. And I vote. I would encourage my readers to do likewise.

My excitement for the day yesterday actually was kind of exciting. My area got the Blue Angels flyover, and the route took them pretty close to my neighborhood, about 9 miles from where they’d be directly overhead. I live in a pretty deep valley, so I walked up the hill to the parking lot of the movie theater that’s at the top of the hill. I can pretty much see the whole region from there, so I figured it would be a good vantage point. There were a few cars in the parking lot with people watching, so I wasn’t alone in that idea.

And we did get a good view. We could see part of the loop they made around downtown Dallas, and from that distance they looked like one plane (in fact, I wondered where the rest of them were). Then they flew right by us on the way to their next “stop,” and we could still see where they turned on their vapor trails for the next hospital. I grew up around military bases, so I’ve seen a lot of stunt flying and air shows, but I don’t think I’ve seen the Blue Angels before. That was some really tight flying, so close that they really did look like one plane from not that far away.

Then I came home and tried to go back to work. I’ve figured out how to fix some of the problems with the second mystery novel, and I even managed to do some writing on it this morning. I haven’t been able to put words together in a while, so that’s pretty exciting. I can already feel a difference in how the book’s working.

So maybe I’ll get these books finished and launched this year, after all.

I made my excursion into the outside world for supplies yesterday morning, and I timed it well, as the stores were relatively uncrowded. They had flour, but not the kind I prefer, so I figured I could get by on what I have, and they still didn’t have the kind of bread I like. Oddly, there was no cumin at all, but I think I’ve got enough for the things I’m planning to make in the next couple of weeks. But I did get some dark chocolate in the post-Easter sale, and I got the last of the plain hams (the rest were the fancy ones with glazes). I was torn about when to cook the ham, since the “use or freeze” date is in June, but I think I’m going to bake it today, since we’re having an odd cold snap, and it’s a good day to have the oven on. Then I can freeze some of the leftovers and also use ham to cook so many things. Plus, I managed to get some dried peas, so I can use the bone to make split-pea soup.

I’ve got enough food to last me a few weeks, though I may need to go out a couple of weeks from now to get dairy and some fresh produce. I’ve got bread flour and whole-wheat flour. It’s just all-purpose flour I’m running low on, and that’s mostly for pastries and sweets, which I don’t really need (and my brownie recipe only uses 1/4 cup). So I’m pretty well set.

I think I came up with a title convention for my mystery series. It’s somewhat lacking in imagination, but I was thinking of doing it like the Nancy Drew books and just naming each book after the case. Of the books I’ve written so far, I have “The Mystery of the Dead Editor” and “The Case of the Curious Crystals.” My concern is that this doesn’t really say anything about the underlying “gimmick” of the series. For instance, the bakery-related mysteries have titles like “Tart of Darkness” or “Risky Biscuits.” My gimmick is that these books are set in a small town where a carnival sideshow got stranded during the Depression — and a lot of the sideshow performers had real paranormal gifts, like mindreading, fortunetelling, channeling electricity, etc. Now their descendants are spread through the town, and a lot of them have inherited the gifts. The crimes generally involve the use of these gifts, but the good guys also have abilities that help in solving the cases. The challenge is that reading a suspect’s mind doesn’t count as probable cause, so they still have to find clues and evidence to be able to take action. I really should probably find some clever, punny titles involving sideshow stuff, but I haven’t been able to think of any ways to take a common phrase and change it around to add the sideshow element. Plus, it would probably end up being a spoiler if I highlight the gift involved in the case in the title. There really aren’t a lot of words or phrases that apply to sideshows. I think the term “freaks” is rather nasty when applied to people in this situation, and most of the other things I can think of are more related to a circus than a carnival. I’ve even gone back and watched some episodes of the series Carnivale, which is about the kind of group I imagine ended up in this town, but it didn’t give me any ideas.

While I was brainstorming, I may have come up with the plot for the next books, so I’ll have to work on developing that.

I may have spent more mental energy trying to come up with title ideas than I did to write the books.

I’ve decided to treat this as kind of a holiday, since it’s Holy Week, even though there are no physical church services. We’ve got some online things tonight and tomorrow night and then on Sunday morning. For the first time in ages, I won’t have to get to church before 7:30 in the morning and then sing for three services. I’ve already done my singing, which is going to be edited into a choir.

We had a really nice morning here, so I had breakfast on my patio. I found a tiny jar of Devonshire clotted cream in the fridge (I’d bought it a while ago but never got around to using it), so I had a nice cream tea for breakfast, with scones, cream, strawberry jam, and tea. I know a cream tea is usually more of an afternoon thing, but it’s a delightful breakfast. It was nice just sitting outside, listening to the birds singing, watching the little lizards play among my plants. I’m doing research reading right now, so I may work outside today, as long as the weather permits (we’re supposed to get some rain later).

My survival strategy in lockdown seems to be to find little pleasures in everyday life, to turn routine things into events — like a cream tea for breakfast on the patio, or a movie night, or a reading afternoon. Last night was spa night, using my facial sauna and a clay masque and some skin treatments.

Since I have my sewing machine out for making a mask, I may see what else I can make with the material and patterns I have (which isn’t much), or else just practice sewing straight seams and controlling the machine. If I get really desperate, I suppose I could dig up something I don’t wear anymore from the donation bag, take it apart, and put it back together.

Not that I’m bored. I’m just trying to look for more constructive uses of my time so I don’t fall into the Internet sinkhole. It helps to stay active rather than mindlessly clicking or watching. I’m finding writing difficult, so I’m doing writing-adjacent things, and then maybe I’ll find myself inspired to write once I get my mind settled down.

I got back to the mystery project yesterday, staring a round of revision, during which I hope to come up with a plot for the next book and an idea for series titles.

You’d think I’d have more time to write right now, but I seem to be being more social during lockdown than I usually am. My parents and friends are checking in on me, so I’m talking on the phone a lot more. Then there are video meetings and livestreams. People are putting concerts and shows online. Our local PBS station is doing educational programming for various levels of school during the day, and their “high school” programs are the kinds of things I like to watch, with history documentaries and literary adaptation movies.

As a result, it takes a lot of willpower to get to work when there are so many distractions.

Not to mention, cute animal videos. I love the videos of penguins getting tours of their aquariums while there are no visitors. I think in my next career I’m going to be a penguin wrangler. Or there’s the orangutan playing with the otters, or the one who’s now washing her hands a lot after seeing her keepers washing their hands more often. And there’s the bear who set the fallen traffic cone upright. And the mountain goats who are invading the Welsh town now that there are fewer people around (the version with the video edited to “Ride of the Valkyries” is classic).

In real life, I just have squirrels, lizards, and the Canada geese who seem to have decided to stick around in my neighborhood. Most of them are gone, but there’s this one pair that’s hanging out with a mallard family. If I hear them honking, it makes me think of fall, and then I remember what time of year it is.

This is shaping up to be a really weird year (and I imagine that’s the understatement of the century).

I ventured into the Outside World this morning because I had to pick up a prescription, and I restocked on groceries while I was out. Now I’m back safe at home with provisions for another couple of weeks. I may have to get somewhat creative with menus and I’ll have to bake my own bread, but I got most of what was on my list.

I made my own mask to wear for when I go out. It will require some fine-tuning because the instructions I followed were probably for a larger person. And it seems my ears don’t work well with the elastic loops, so I’ll have to make the kind that ties on. Although the WHO was saying healthy people don’t need them, I’ve seen a lot of other research showing that the countries where mask use is more universal have a much lower infection curve. The mask may only reduce your risk by about 50 percent, but the real benefit is that if more people are wearing masks, then they’re all less likely to spread the virus, and it looks like as many as 30 percent of people infected have no symptoms. It’s safest to act as though you’re infected in order to protect others, and along the way you may also be protecting yourself. I live in a majority Asian neighborhood, so a good number of people at the stores were wearing masks.

I also managed to get some socializing last night with a video chat with my church women’s group. So I may not go entirely feral while isolated.

And I took the long way to the store, mostly to let my car get up to highway speed a little bit, but that also meant I got to see fields of bluebonnets. That was a nice little lift to the spirits before I hide away for another couple of weeks.

It’s funny how quickly my worldview is adapting to the new normal. My dreams and nightmares have changed. I used to have nightmares about being in a crowd of people where I knew no one. Now I’m having nightmares about being at parties with all my friends and realizing that we’re all standing too close to each other. I had a dream last night about finding unexpected fresh produce in my refrigerator, a head of lettuce I’d forgotten about that was still miraculously fresh. I’ve found myself daydreaming about what I want to buy next time I go out for groceries.

Meanwhile, it’s affecting the way I see entertainment. I haven’t been watching TV all week, but I watched an episode of Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist last night, and the scenes of crowded restaurants and bars really bothered me. It was like watching a horror movie. I may have to stick with fantasy and historical settings, where it seems less strange and frightening for people to be acting like “normal.”

But then that brings up the issue of how to write contemporary works now. The first book in my mystery series takes place in February of this year. There’s no obvious date stamp in the book, but it’s planned for release this year, and the primary election is mentioned in the story as coming up soon. The second book takes place after spring break, so right around now. I found myself wondering if I needed to rewrite it, since there are large public events and school is in session. I decided to leave it as it is. After all, it’s already an alternate reality, since it’s a world where people have strange “magical” abilities. In the first book, there’s a huge ice storm that plays a big role in the plot, and that didn’t happen this year in the approximate location where the book is set. If I’m not rewriting to remove an ice storm that didn’t happen, then I’m not rewriting to add social distancing and sheltering in place. The books may be released this year (I hope!), but people will be reading them at random times, hopefully years into the future. But that may be why I can’t seem to make myself work on these books right now. I don’t want to write current events into the books, but I also can’t visualize anything contemporary without the current reality. So, I’m playing with fantasy works for now.

I’m kind of seeing why the book I’m re-reading didn’t sell. It’s rather quirky, and the heroine doesn’t have a lot of “agency,” which is big with publishers. But she’s in a situation that’s entirely out of her control. That’s the whole point of the story. Her agency is in how she copes with the situation. I’ll have to read through to the end to be sure I want to inflict it upon the world in some form. It does seem as though it’s made for serialization. I was really good about scene-ending cliffhangers.